I’ve got a feeling…

What do you want in life? Want to find a partner in life, make money, create a home you love?Then start with focusing on how it will make you feel.Because when you unwrap it all – all our desires, all our wants – when you boil them right down. What you get to is not a desire for things, but a desire for feeling a certain way.So fast-forward yourself to that hoped-for future. You’ve got it. You’ve made it. There you. You have it safely and securely in your life. Hallelujah.


What is the feeling that having that in your life will give you?

Do you feel free, adored, safe, at peace, empowered, content…?

Whatever it is, that is where you need to start. That feeling. You need to start cultivating it if you want to give that dream a chance.

Now I don’t mean, if you can find a way to just feel rich then you don’t have to earn any money at all and you’ll live like a king, but rather that, by focusing on the feeling, creating what you want in life becomes a much easier and enjoyable experience.

Where we get totally disempowered is in thinking that we need to ‘have…’ in order to ‘do…’ so that we can then ‘be…’.That until you have things the way you want, you’ll never feel the way you want.

Know what that does? It makes it hard. Hard to create lives we love. It makes us anxious and needy. It makes us block the path to the dreams we want to realize.

Want to know the easier route? The short-cut? The one where you don’t cry yourself to sleep from the pain of longing?

You flip it.

Focus on the feeling.

Start there.

When you start with the feeling you go to the heart of the desire and get a big chunk of it fulfilled right away and the best way to bring what you want in your life – whether it’s money, mate or making a difference – is to focus on the feeling.

I know you’ll likely have heard it before: Be > Do > Have rather than Have > Do > Be, but it’s so important to keep coming back to it because most of the messages around us tell us that if we want to feel a certain way we need to have certain things first. Consumerism relies on us holding onto this belief.

So it gets drummed in. And old habits die hard. It takes practice to break out of them.

So let’s practice.

What is it that you really want right now in your life that you haven’t got?

How will it make you feel when you finally have that securely in your life?

Now hold on to that feeling because THAT is where we create from.

Next step: cultivate that feeling.

What do you associate with that feeling? What places? What people? What activities? What environments?

Get as much of that into your life right now. Why? Because the more you cultivate that feeling into your life, the more that feeling will affect your behaviour and your actions and suddenly low and behold things are starting to align themselves with that feeling so that you are experiencing that feeling more and more in your life.

I’ve been doing this around money in particular for the past 3 years and it is working like a dream. Ha! Literally.

It has been the greatest example that my life shapes itself around whatever feeling I most focus on.

And remember that applies to the negative feelings just as much as the positive. I’ve learnt my lessons on that front too.

So when you want a change in your life, when you are craving something. Ask yourself what you want to feel and start there. Start bringing the things that you already can into your life that help you feel that way. Do it consciously, proactively, mindfully and just see what happens. See how your life shifts into a new shape…

Now that is power.

Let’s play with it ; )

Selina Barker